'Ode to Michael

HAPPY 5th Anniversary Pumkinbutt! I love you soooo much! In honor of you, I am posting 5 of my very favorite pics of you!





xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I AM A Fa-REAK!

Seriously. So, I'm lying in bed. Its almost midnight and my mind is churning over what a freak of nature I am. I grew up with asthma and allergies. No big. But then weird things started happening. Like I choked on my food. Had to get my throat stretched out twice. With a balloon. Because apparently I'm allergic to certain foods that slowly swell my throat over time. Eosinophilic esophogitis. Oh, and then there was that episode of severe stomach cramping and blood in poop for a week with lots of tubal testing and no answers. Lets not forget the shingles. That's right. Who gets shingles??? And there's one little condition I have that I refuse to post in the internet. Let's just say its not right. Oh and then there's the anxiety attacks. What? Why? Plus there's the two blood clotting disorders. Apparently I have the same chance of winning the lottery as having dos thrombosis disorders. Which by the way makes me take heparin shots twice daily when pregnant. And which also excludes me from having insurance. Awesome. Plus it apparently caused Avery to be born a month early and within an inch of his life due to Oligohydramnios (amniotic fluid loss). You may remember I pee my pants more than any 30 year old should and I'm fat. HALF my hair went curl-frizztastic after having kids and my pinkies are crooked (so are Avery's).
Moving on to current matters. Went to the dentist 2 weeks ago. Got a crown. Now I have LOADS of pain radiating from tooth to ear. LOADS. L-O-A-D-S. I am on MAJOR pain meds and still feel it. Dentist doesn't get it. Went to doctor. He suspects possible infection somewhere he can't see, but most likely...Atypical (trigeminal) neuralgia. WHAT!!!!!!!! Care to read a bit of what Wikipedia has to say?:
"In the atypical form of TN, the pain presents itself as severe constant aching. The pain associated with TN is recognized as one of the most excruciating pains that can be experienced."
"ATN can have a wide range of symptoms and the pain can fluctuate in intensity from mild aching to a crushing or burning sensation, and also to the extreme pain experienced with the more common trigeminal neuralgia. ATN pain can be described as heavy, aching, and burning. Sufferers have a constant migraine-like headache and experience pain in all three trigeminal nerve branches. This includes aching teeth, ear aches, feeling of fullness in sinuses, cheek pain, pain in forehead and temples, jaw pain, pain around eyes, and occasional electric shock-like stabs. Unlike typical neuralgia, this form can also cause pain in the back of the scalp and neck. Pain tends to worsen with talking, facial expressions, chewing, and certain sensations such as a cool breeze. Vascular compression of the trigeminal nerve, infections of the teeth or sinuses, physical trauma, or past viral infections are possible causes of ATN."
"This disease has earned the nickname "the suicide disease," due to the unfortunate and drastic steps some have taken when they have been unable to find relief."
THE SUICIDE DISEASE!!!! THE FREAKING SUICIDE DISEASE!!!!!
I don't even have something normal like cancer. I might possibly have to live with this? Chronic pain! Uh, that's not okay. Its a no-go. Okay then.
Oh, and there's one more freakish thing. I have always been 65 and one half inches. Since puberty. For almost twenty years. That's 5 feet 5 and a half inches. And as of today, I am measuring 66 and one fourth inches. BLOW MY MIND!!! How does that happen? Really? Is that possible!
But I can honestly say (excluding the recent pain), I feel like a genuinely healthy person.
I don't know what to think... EXCEPT I do know that my grandparents were somehow related.....hmmmmmmm.....